Listeners’ Letter

Dear Food,

Our love and hate relationship has been ebbing and flowing. It all started really innocently wanting to opt for “healthier options’ ‘ until it led me to an unhealthy place. A place where I feared you, a place where I felt guilty after eating you, and a place that took away all the pleasure and freedom around guilt.

I’ve been recovering from an eating disorder for almost 2 years now and although our relationship is relatively better, we could say that we are not in peace yet. Diet culture has made me believe that there are “bad” and “good” foods. That I should fear some of you. That some of you are evil. I really want to change that, I want to make peace with you.

I’m trying to unlearn all the lies and myth diet culture has taught me but it’s hard, you know?

I’ve been trying really hard to reject diets, the mentality of good and bad and surround myself with anti-diet, body positivity, and food freedom content. But I’m struggling to take action steps to have a better relationship with you. It’s easy to consume and motivate me with a lot of inspiring content but it’s overwhelming, you know? I mean… There are so many fear foods I need to face, unlearn diet myths, change my mentality around food, learn to brush off diet comments, relearn how to listen to my body and treat it with respect and so much more that I need to do… I don’t even know where to start. Also, I’m afraid, I feel alone and I am afraid of what will happen if I let go of control and food restriction.

I really want to have a better relationship but things like diet culture, fear of weight gain, or eating disorder thoughts get in the way?

I won’t give up food, I am positive I will get to a place where I no longer fear you but embrace you. I know I will get there one day,

This girl needs a little guidance!

Love,

Not Giving Up