My past trauma keeps me from healing my relationship with food (Ep 110 with Julie Church and Kara Bazzi)

Are you struggling to accept your body size, even though you’ve made peace with food? Is past trauma still affecting our ability to find true and lasting recovery? Julie Church and Kara Bazzi join me to break down this part of the Food Peace™ journey.

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This episode is brought to you by my online course, Your Step-by-Step Guide to PCOS and Food Peace™. Sign up now to get on the waitlist for the next enrollment period in April, and receive my FREE road map: Your First 3 Steps Toward Food Peace™ with PCOS. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how

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Episode’s Key Points:

  • Working with a dietitian and therapist TEAM is so important for full recovery! Julie Church, RD, and Kara Bazzi, therapist, from Opal: Food + Body Wisdom Center join us to talk about this week’s letter.
  • Our eating behaviors are coping mechanisms, and sometimes we have to engage in some disordered behaviors to protect ourselves.
  • Shifting our relationship with our body is SO hard, especially when body hatred has plagued us for so long.
  • Seeking healing means there’s HOPE to find further growth and peace!
  • Our world is so, SO fatphobic, and it wrongly connects our weight to our health and our self-worth. Part of the work is disconnecting weight from these other factors.
  • Making peace with food and acting in self-care through nourishing ourselves does NOT mean you will lose weight, and it does NOT mean you’ll be in a smaller body! Food peace doesn’t equate to thinness.
  • Support yourself through this weight bias we experience by finding community. Advocate for yourself, and demand respect for your body! You deserve safe relationships.
  • Interrogate what’s behind the body hatred! Trauma, weight bias… these things can contribute to us not feeling safe in our bodies and disrupt our body image. Part of the process is striving for a more relational relationship with our bodies. Investigate some somatic work, and dig deep.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.

I want to hide my bad habits from my kids {with Lindsay Stenovec}

Do you deal with binge eating? Did you experience bullying, specifically within your own family, that relates to your body shape or size? Have you experienced sexual abuse, and feel that it has impacted your relationship with food and your body? Are you trying to set a healthy example for your own children after having a difficult relationship with food in your past? Listen now for some expert advice on how to cope with these body trust struggles.

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Check out this summer’s special blog post series: Empowering Your PCOS Journey. It aims to help you understand PCOS, improve your relationship with food, and advocate for better care. You will be hearing from nutrition grad student Kimberly Singh and her experiences with PCOS as well as evidenced based info to help arm yourself with the most up-to-date research. Find it here now: JulieDillonRD.com/PCOSseries

Episode’s Key Points:

  • Sometimes our family environments can be just as toxic as this culture that we live in… remember, we ALL live in diet culture!! But that doesn’t make our family’s actions okay.
  • Abuse, physical or mental, can have a profound impact on our relationship with food and our body.
  • Lindsay Stenovec of The Nurtured Mama joins to talk about the complex interactions of motherhood and our relationship with food!
  • Processing this kind of trauma is essential… find a therapist to work through these difficult emotions and to help you cope with your past!
  • Sometimes we use food to cope with our emotions… this is totally understandable, but we can take steps to help heal this part of our relationship with food if we find it interfering with us living our lives.
  • We are all doing the very best that we can under our own circumstances! This doesn’t make us a failure or a fraud.
  • How do we feed others when we’ve had such a fraught relationship with food and body ourselves?
  • As parents, we do our best to shield our children from pain, especially from pain that we have experienced ourselves. Many mamas are trying to shield their children from the pain that they themselves experienced in relation to food and body… but sometimes this backfires when parents do so by trying to get their children to lose weight or to eat in a “perfect” way.
  • Feeling acceptable is SO important to finding body peace and body trust! Instead of repeating the same cycle of trying to control your own child’s food intake or body shape, focus on the unconditional acceptance you have for your child and help them to foster this body acceptance in themselves, no matter the outside influences.
  • We should ALWAYS feel safe at home, even if we live in diet-culture world!
  • We’re all just doing the best that we can!!
  • What does it mean to eat in a “healthy” way? How do we make peace with food and our bodies?
  • Ellyn Satter’s definition of normal eating is a helpful resource!!
  • Healthy eating is more about being connected to life, not about what we put in our bodies.
  • Our relationship with food and our bodies is about very complicated, difficult, and personal truths. It has to do with the food, but it also doesn’t! Our past has a HUGE impact on all of this, and it’s SO important to find support around figuring all of this stuff out. Find a trauma, Health at Every Size, and eating-disorder-trained therapist or dietitian to help you along this journey!!
  • Raising children brings up the difficult parts in ourselves that still need more work.
  • Going to therapy is a BRAVE choice! It is hard, but it gives us the tools to move forward in our lives and find healing.
  • Stress, discomfort, and feeling like a fraud are messages from our body! These emotions mean there is something that needs to be addressed within.
  • Secretive eating, shame, and hiding of food is an understandable reaction to growing up in an environment that body and food shamed you! The important question is not, “How do I stop,” but, “What do these actions tell me about my needs?”
  • Sometimes we don’t learn sustainable coping skills as a child… therapy can help us bolster our toolbox of coping mechanisms as adults!
  • Normal eating is FLEXIBLE!!! Normal eating is trusting our body to make up for our “mistakes” in our eating, and being compassionate about our choices.
  • In the end, it is JUST food.
  • When you trust your body to take care of yourself, it’ll do the best that it can.

Show Notes:

Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com. 

Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

Thank you for listening to the Love, Food series.